As i write this, i am nearing the end of my Tibetan studies at Thrangu Tashi Yangtse monastery in Namo Buddha, Nepal. We have only 2 weeks left, and then it's on to the next thing... whatever that is.
It is my aspiration to do ngöndro retreat at Palpung Sherabling, near His Holiness the Gyalwang Karmapa, and afterwards to attend the Kagyu Mönlam in Bodhgaya. That's what i'd like to do. However, it's not up to me.
If i am to enter retreat, i must have the blessing of the 17th Karmapa. I am completely at his mercy. He will tell me what is best for dispelling the darkness of my ignorance and purifying my obscurations, as only the most Powerful of Victors can. If he says for me not to go into retreat, but rather to return to the U.S. and integrate my practice into finding a job so that i can be active in my daughter's life, then that's exactly what i'll do. I must completely and utterly surrender my ego to him, so that it may he may obliterate it with his indestructible Vajra speech.
So after August, i will go to the Gyalwang Karmapa and put my destiny in his hands. May we all benefit!
May the Lion's Roar resound throughout the ten directions and the three times! May it never diminish, but only grow ever stronger!
(Please contact me if you're interested in helping...)